Updated: Oct 14, 2022
The Self-Love Tool Box Instructions Guide
Thank you for investing in the 2021 Self-Love Kit. 2020 has been such a challenging year and so many of us have been struggling mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially. It’s imperative that you implement self-care to avoid fatigue, suffering of relationships/friendships, addiction to substances, and low self-esteem.
Materials Needed: Before you dig into the supplies, it is important to note that loving yourself takes time. Consistency and commitment is key! In order for you to master self-care you have to not only be willing to take care of yourself physically, but emotionally and mentally. It’s not all about candles, bubble baths, and manicures, self-care is about facing your wounds and honoring your past. Self-love is about acknowledging that you have fears, scars, and flaws as well. When you master self-love you are no longer the victim. You begin to approve, and respect yourself. The supplies you will need are courage, consistency, commitment, determination, gratefulness, and a smile!
Step One: Release your emotions. One of the worst things you can do as a human being is suppress your feelings. It’s important to have an outlet whether it is therapy, journaling, making video diaries etc. Releasing your emotions allows you to be more authentic, and attract what you really want and need in your life.
Step Two: Look at yourself in the mirror. Before you jump down my throat, I know most of you have looked at yourselves in the mirror, but most times it is because you are doing your hair, or looking at a very big pimple. Mirror gazing is looking into your eyes for a few minutes or longer. Make sure you are alone, take a few deep breaths, and allow yourself to relax. This may be very awkward at first but it is a very beneficial tool for self-compassion. When we mirror gaze, we are facing ourselves literally and figuratively, while relinquishing self-conception.
Step Three: Take risks! Do what you have never done before. Visit a new country or state, try new foods, a new outfit, a new hairstyle etc. When you step out of our comfort zone, your self-confidence increases drastically because you are putting your fears and insecurities aside. Sure you may still be fearful when you step outside of the box, but you are not letting the fear take control.
Step Four: Take a break. If you are from America, this one may sound absurd! Americans are used to the hamster wheel “work until you drop” mentality. The problem with this is that you can get so caught up trying to accomplish tasks that you don’t realize how much you are neglecting yourself. When you take a break you may notice that you don’t even like the job you are working for, or the friends you have, or the relationship you are in. Or you may be aware of this and stay busy to escape your emotions but, they will always come back to haunt you!
Step Five: Stop settling! Settling is usually rooted in fear and laziness. I know you have bills. I know your rent is due next month, but do you realize not settling starts with the mind first? If you are content with staying complacent then you will stay there, this goes for relationships too!
Step Six: Practice affirmations. Saying “I am beautiful” to yourself in the mirror for the first time may feel very uncomfortable. If you stay consistent however, it will become natural. Whether it is self-respect, self-compassion, self-esteem, or motivation that you lack, take away the insufficiency by telling yourself that you already have it. For newbies, it is best to get some guidance but don’t be afraid to add a little spice to your affirmations. Instead of saying “I am authentic” say “I operate in my purest, rawest, form.”
Step Seven: Give yourself a hug! Yes I am serious, and hug yourself like you mean it! You can do this when you wake up, before you go to bed, after a meditation session etc. Hugging yourself helps relieve stress, anxiety, and increases your confidence.
Step Eight: Exercise, please. You don’t have to jog up forty hills in order to exercise. If you are not a fan of it, start off small. Go for a walk, take the stairs, instead of parking your car close to your destination, park it a little farther. You can also try yoga which is very beneficial for people who don’t prefer the hard core workouts.
Step Nine: Set boundaries! If you are used to conforming into what other people want you to be, not only will setting boundaries bring more serenity, but it will also allow you to to see who really loves and appreciates you. People who genuinely care about you may be a little upset when you say no, but they are not going to use it against you. If you don’t feel like going out with a friend, tell them that you would love to, but you’re not up for it, and ask to reschedule.
I think the worst way to set boundaries is to lie. I know you don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings but whatever your reason for not wanting to do something is, stick with it. By all means you do not have to give most people a reason but make sure you are standing firm on your beliefs.
It is important to note that you will lose people when you start to become your most authentic self!
Boundaries are also important because they teach others how we regulate ourselves. Speaking up when you are disrespected, saying what you really feel, and doing what you feel is right, is all part of setting boundaries!
Step Nine: UNPLUG! Put down the phone, take a break from social media, and get acquainted with the outside world. Learning how to separate from your phone will help you connect better with yourself, family, and friends. Yes, this is way more difficult in a tech savvy world that’s why you start off small. Set your phone on do not disturb, turn off your social media and message notifications, put your phone in another room, leave your phone home while going for a walk, or pick a day out of the week where you don’t use your phone at all.
Step Ten: Take care of your personal hygiene. Wash your hair regularly, shower regularly, clean your face daily, moisturize your skin daily so it can stay soft and supple, brush your teeth twice a day, and keep your clothes clean. Don't forget to clean in between your toes, behind your neck, and your ears!
Step Eleven: Get some sleep! Staying up all night is not okay, especially if you have to work or go to school in the morning. Forcing yourself to go to sleep isn’t either, that’s why waking up earlier is more ideal. If you are dealing with a sleeping disorder such as insomnia, try to get to the root of it. Be a little more productive during the day, and when it’s time to go to bed, set the mood! Turn off your TV, read a book or take a hot shower before bed, light a candle, and stop eating after nine p.m.
Warnings and Cautions: If you are used to self-sabotaging or putting others first using the Self-Love Toolbox will be a little challenging for you. As you elevate and become the most highest version of yourself, you will reflect on your “lower self” decisions. You may be inspired to make a change with your friendships, relationships, and jobs. You may realize that your old habits and beliefs are not in alignment with who you are now. When you use the Self-Love Toolbox you will lose people, face some ugly truths, but most importantly, you will glow!
The producer accepts no risk for results when the item is utilized while the operator is in denial and can’t put in the required effort. These practices for the most part increase stress, anxiety, and close mindedness. Should any of these occur, buyers are encouraged to apply self-care generously. In the event that guidelines are reliably followed, buyers will enjoy a wholesome, fulfilled, and epic life.