What is a soul tie?
When two souls collide in the blink of an eye.
A situation that a lot of people think you dramatize, not realizing that even when you physically leave, the situation still isn't finalized.
Isn’t it amazing how beautiful everything is in the beginning?
This person has you grinning and believing that you are somehow "winning."
Then your heart starts imprinting on a soul that begins trimming on parts of you that were once whole, until they came and took control.
It is normal to feel pain after a departure but why do I still feel you after all of these years?
There was no physicality only mental brutality and insincere commonality.
I miss your voice, I miss the rush I got from making the wrong choice.
I miss hearing the the sweet talk, and the lies.
To my surprise, those temporary highs were the cause of my slow demise.
No no no! I didn’t literally die but something did end. When I left you, I no longer felt the need to defend or pretend.
I didn’t intend to offend but I needed you to apprehend that nothing about this tie made sense.
Why do I miss the manipulation even though I knew it was an invasion to my mind haven, making me cave in?
Why do I feel exhilaration over excruciation?
Figuring out this situation requires patience
God, my self-love is in the basement!
I knew leaving you was the right thing to do even though it felt wrong.
I just needed you to understand but you couldn’t if I let the situation prolong.
I wasn’t happy and I was tired of the same toxic cycle.
Me allowing you back in without a title,
and allowing my mind to spiral while you continued to be spiteful.
In my opinion we were 2 fearful souls trying to come together.
I had to let go for the better because you feared relationships and I feared love altogether.
Our brokenness created more ferociousness.
The longer I held on the more I lost my wholesomeness, you were so emotionless.
Connecting with others who felt the same helped me feel less shame.
Even though you caused so much pain, it's me who I blame.
Strange how you say “I love you” right after something distasteful. How inhumane?
The mind games were insane, you kept trying to convince me that you changed,
when you were just concealing.
When we’re apart I start healing but when you return,
I’m back at the beginning.
Square 1, where you say I'm the only one, after I tell you I’m done
but I knew that was a trick. I was actually number 3 or 4 or 5 or 6.
You pretending to be a gentleman fucked up my mental man.
I was nothing but your little experiment, you were here for your own benefit and
that’s why when I took my power back, you resented it.
~Mahogany Jenkins
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